personally

help me not desire that which i desire more than my desire for You.
you know my inner most desire,
in fact, you should be that inner most desire.
rather, i should question these desires that i so called desire.


when you dropped that message to me today
i see you finally moving, soaring.
happy but yet sad that you're moving further
but i thank you for that
because what followed after was a moment of questions thrown at me;

am i taking joy in what i do?
am i a hobbyist?
a person who jumps easily from one thing to another
a jack of all trades, and a master of none
a person who can do everything yet nothing.

am i following or am i pioneering/leading?

have i been impacting my target audience?
or just been producing eye candy?


a timely question.

reminded me of something i heard from my dad
and i want to claim it back
that very same thing i told God i'd use 5yrs ago to impact lives
my view of it has changed dratically over the years and its sad
cuz if my view of it has changed, so has my belief in it
but if this is the direction You want me to head
i'll go back there, back to the drawing board :)

I believe i can do it with God.