personally

Was really distracted yesterday with alot of thoughts filling my mind.

negative ones especially. i couldn't focus.

stopped to list out my thought and did some digging.

i was disappointed and was still nursing the disappointed,

i realized i've got unreasonable expectations which are not voiced out which of course leads to it not being met and me being disappointed.

i scolded myself for thinking this way.

should i lower my expectation? not a compromise either. 

but yeah, i realized that i've gotten spiteful too and would want to intently make someone who disappointed me feel bad. (i'd make you feel bad for making me feel bad)

-what goes around comes around.

but i realized, thats unfair and stupid. the person doesn't even deserve this. 

and as i highlighted this inner ugliness of mine i knew i had to bring it to light.

an ugly side of me. 

God blessed the time though. i was amazed :) :)